Turkeys on the Gridiron

By Steve Harvey
Pro Hockey Editor

How the Mighty Fell

We interrupt coverage of the Bottom Ten race to bring you the results of the Biggest Flops of the Year competition, honoring highly-touted teams that have fallen the furthest in the rankings.

The biggest flop was Arkansas, which was ranked No. 10 in AP's pre-season Top 25 off its 2011 record of 11-2. The Razorbacks have since sunk to 4-7 and departed from the AP poll. (Arkansas is No. 64 in the Sagarin ratings.)

Others who took impressive nose-dives include USC (7-4), which has gone from No. 1 to No. 30, and Little Ten conference member Wisconsin (7-4), which dropped from No. 12 preseason to No. 35.

In a related study---the Most Overpaid College Coach competition---USA Today found that Kansas (1-10) coach Charlie Weis was paid $2.5 million this year (meaning he received $2.5 million per win, according to calculations by the Bottom Ten's sophisticated Univac computers).

Others in this category include Cal coach Jeff Tedford, who received a $2.6 million salary that produced 3 wins; Colorado's Jon Embree, paid $725,000 for one win; and Southern Miss' Ellis Johnson, paid $790,000 and winless.

Wreck, Record.............. PreSeason AP Rank..Current AP Rank*
1. Arkansas (4-7).............No. 10............................Unranked
2. West Virginia (5-5)..... No. 11........................... Unranked
3. Michigan St (5-6)........ No. 13........................... Unranked
4. Virginia Tech (5-6)..... No. 24........................... Unranked
5. USC (7-4)................... No. 1............................. No. 30
6. TCU (6-4)................... No. 20........................... No. 39
7. Wisconsin (7-4)........... No. 12........................... No. 35
8. Michigan (8-3)............ No. 8............................. No. 20
9. Oklahoma (8-2)........... No. 4 .............................No. 14
*Only 40 schools received votes


Crummy Game of the Weak: Southern Ole Miss (0-11) vs. Memphis (3-8).

Semi-Pros

While the Kansas City Chefs (1-9) and Jack (1-9) stayed atop the Bottom Ten, Cleveland (2-8)   signaled that it's by no means out of the race.

The Browns are now under the ownership of truck-stop magnate Jimmy Haslam III, a perfect fit for the team. A Browns game is a comfy place to take a nap.

The Raiders, meanwhile, have a decade of reverse momentum on their side. With their next loss Oakland (3-7) will mark its 10th straight year without a winning record. Hence the Raiders' new motto: "Commitment to Extinction."

Worst Coach of the Week honors went to Bill Belichick of New England, who left star tight end Rob Gronkowski in the game for a pointless point-after-touchdown---the Pats' 59th and last point in a 59-24 romp. Gronkowski suffered a broken arm on the play.

Explained Belichick afterward, "I don't think there are any quicker ways to lose a game than getting a kick blocked and run back for a touchdown."

Uh, Coach, you can't run a point-after-touchdown back for a touchdown. And even if you could, you were ahead by 34 points with 3:55 left to play.

Wreck, Record.................. Last Loss....................... Next Loss
1. (Tie) Kansas City (1-9)... 6-28, Cincinnati ..............Denver
1. Jack (1-9)...................... 37-43, Houston................. Tennessee
3. Cleveland (2-8) .............20-23, Dallas......................The Pitts
4. Oakland (3-7)................ 17-38, New Orleans .........Cincinnati
5. Carolina (2-8)................ 21-27, Tampa Bay (OT) ...Philadelphia
6. Philadelphia (3-7); 7. Arizona (4-6); 8. St. Louis (3-6-1); 9. San Diego (4-6); 10. N.J. Jets (4-6).

Crummy Game of the Weekend: Carolina (2-8) vs. Philadelphia (3-7).

Turkey of the Week: Houston (9-1) vs. Detroit (4-6)* on Thanksgiving (certainly not a banquet that viewers will give thanks for).
*Lions have 1-10 record on Thanksgiving since 2001.